johnbyronkuhner.com

      Gandhi said that every man should clean his own toilet.  Today I’ve taken a new step forward by installing my own.

      My old toilet cracked when I left water in it before leaving for Christmas – the water froze and broke its ceramic mold.

      It took me a few days to prepare myself for the deed – looking at a How-to book to convince me I could do it, thinking about it (always a long step in any process for me), and then going to buy the parts.  During that time I definitely missed my own commode, and resolved to get it done by Tuesday, before a snowstorm which was due to arrive in the evening.

      The hardest part of the preparation was the shopping.  I dread a trip to Home Depot under any circumstances, and sure enough, it was the same problem as ever.  What was the difference between the fifteen or so toilets they had – ranging in price from $99 to $400?  They were all ceramic, all white; their sizes varied slightly, but not greatly; some did have elongated bowls.  All of them used 1.6 gallons per flush, except two which used slightly less, which were not more expensive.

      In the end I decided to buy a bowl only, as that was the broken part.  This may have been a mistake, but the bowl cost only $38, and seemed to be a reputable brand (Glacier Bay – a fitting name for a toilet that often has chunks of ice floating in it).  It was made in China, not Mexico, as many toilet bowls are.  The reason why it may have been a mistake is that the tank is an awkward fit (though this will not be a problem until springtime when water flows again), and the old seat fits almost not at all.  So I will probably have to buy a tank and a seat later, which may put my costs over one hundred dollars (the cost of the cheapest all-in-one).  The only other part you need is a wax ring to seal the connection between toilet and pipe.  I was impressed that of all the materials in the world, the best for providing a waterproof seal was good old fashioned wax.

      The hardest part of the installation was carrying the new toilet through the heavy snow up the trail to my cabin.  But once I did that, it all went smoothly.  Indeed, it was one of my greatest home-improvement successes of all time.  Gandhi would be proud.  (If only I had made it myself!  Or perhaps not broken by my heedlessness the one I inherited!  Or…)

      Now we’ll see how long before I find a puddle of brown water seeping out of the bottom of the bowl.